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Self-Reg: Busting the Myth of Self-Control

A new book, Self-Reg, explodes the myth that if only children tried harder or had enough willpower, they could control all of their challenging behaviors. The reality is much more complicated than that.

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Relationships in Special Education: We Must Do Better

Far too often, children with special educational needs experience disruptions in relationships, including frequent changes in aides, teachers and school placements, causing stress.

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A Mother’s Day Gift for Ourselves

A recent parenting study shed light on something so simple yet so profound that it may be one of the best gifts you can give yourself and your child.

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The Critical Ingredient that Should Be Part of Every IEP

My wish for families during this IEP season is that emotional regulation, supported by engaged relationships, finds its way into every discussion about a child. A child’s ability to feel safe and engaged provides a solid foundation for all areas of learning and socialization.

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Early Autism Intervention: Yes, You Do Have Options

Since professionals and educators may not apprise you of the many early autism intervention choices available, it’s essential to do your own research and pursue the approach that feels most suitable for your child and family.

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Early Intervention: Taking a Mindful Approach

Early intervention should not be a race against developmental delays, but rather a thoughtful path to nurture each child’s own potential to develop at his or her own pace. A fast pace that emphasizes doing rather than being with a child can interfere with what children need most: an engaged and relaxed parent.

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Ain’t Misbehavin: Understanding Challenging Behaviors from the Inside Out

Challenging behaviors are not always intentional misbehavior. We have to understand the meaning behind them in order to best support each child.

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A Missing Ingredient in Autism Therapies

The emotional life of the child is often not considered in the behavioral treatment of autism. This article offers suggestions to enhance the child's emotional development in autism treatment.

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When Your Child’s Tantrums Make you Tantrum

What a tantruming child needs is an adult who can first help them find calmness in the body, and then later offer teaching moments. Toddlers—all human beings, really—cannot take in new information when they are in an active tantrum state.

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Mona Delahooke, Ph.D.
Mona Delahooke, Ph.D.1 day ago
The look on your face nourishes the soul of the person you are smiling at--I try to always remember this. Thanks Marilyn Price-Mitchell at Roots of Action for sharing! #Resilience #Brainhealth #relationshipsmatter #education #specialed #earlyintervention
Mona Delahooke, Ph.D.
Mona Delahooke, Ph.D.2 days ago
For those interested in the top-down/bottom-up discussion, here's some background info---When we don't understand the difference, it leads to an Expectation Gap. And not just for toddlers, but for all ages. #Expectationgap #toddlerbehaviors #tantrums #positiveparenting #resilience #earlyintervention #socialemotional #polyvagaltheory https://monadelahooke.com/1210-2/
Mona Delahooke, Ph.D.
Mona Delahooke, Ph.D.4 days ago
Many have asked me about the difference between top-down and bottom-up behaviors. A common misperception is that all children's behaviors are top-down -- deliberate misbehaving-- and so they are managed through punishments, consequences or rewards.

That’s the problem. Not all behaviors are top-down; many disruptive behaviors are actually bottom-up.

Bottom-up behaviors do not respond to rewards, consequences or punishments. They are brain-based stress behaviors that require understanding, compassion and actively helping a child feel safe. When we punish a bottom-up behavior, we can easily make matters worse. And this is why so many of our approaches fall short, or even deepen a child or teen’s emotional and behavioral challenges. Understanding the difference will reduce suffering for so many—including those from loving homes, to foster children who have been needlessly blamed for their behaviors, and neurodivergent children inappropriately disciplined for their natural inclinations. #Beyondbehaviors #ACES #Parenting #Paradigmshift #Neurodiversity #specialeducation #Childwelfare
Mona Delahooke, Ph.D.
Mona Delahooke, Ph.D.5 days ago
Thanks Hidden Treasure with Tracey Farrell for this reframe, great synchrony with #Beyondbehaviors!
Mona Delahooke, Ph.D.
Mona Delahooke, Ph.D.6 days ago
Thanks DMDD Journey for such a nice reframe of the term "attention-seeking". #Beyondbehaviors #relationshipsfirst